If you are facing a family dispute or other legal matter, mediation may be encouraged or even required before you proceed to court. As such, you’re likely asking yourself – “How can I prepare for mediation?” – luckily, we’re here to help.
What can I expect during mediation?
Simply put, mediation is an opportunity for both parties to resolve their legal issues in the presence of a neutral third party. Unlike a judge, a mediator does not make decisions for the parties. Instead, they guide discussions, help identify common ground, and encourage productive communication.
During sessions, both parties are typically present along with their lawyers, if they have legal representation. The mediator will usually begin by explaining the process, outlining expectations for respectful communication, and discussing how conflict will be managed if it arises.
Each party is then given an opportunity to explain their position, concerns, and desired outcome. Throughout the session, the mediator helps the parties work through disputed issues, explore possible solutions, and identify areas of compromise. If an agreement is reached, the terms may be drafted into a written agreement for the parties to rely on moving forward.
How can I prepare for mediation?
Being well prepared can make mediation more productive and increase the likelihood of reaching a meaningful agreement. Preparation often involves both practical and emotional considerations.
Before attending mediation, it is helpful to:
- Gather all relevant documents, including court orders, financial records, and appraisal related to the matter;
- Identify and write down the issues you would like resolved;
- Consider what your ideal outcome looks like, along with areas where you can be willing to compromise;
- Speak with your lawyer about your legal rights, obligations, and expectations for the session; and
- Think about potential solutions that can work for both sides in advance rather than focusing only on points of contention.
In family law matters, preparation may also include thinking about parenting schedules, how decision-making responsibilities should be shared, budgets, and the individual needs of the children involved. When parties approach mediation with realistic goals and the best interests of the children in mind, they are more likely to reach agreements focused on long-term success for everyone involved.
While it is important to prepare yourself practically, it is equally important to prepare yourself emotionally and mentally. Entering the room with an intention to come to a meaningful resolution increases the effectiveness of mediation and the likelihood of reaching an agreement.
If your situation is emotional or high conflict, take time to identify and even practice coping skills that help you stay calm and focused. Deep breathing, doing a mental check in, or just remembering to ask for a short break are all helpful when tension rises.
In the end, mediation works best when parties are well prepared and open minded.
Looking for a mediator? Managing partner and family lawyer Nathan Hayes-Fry is a mediator certified by the Legal Education Society of Alberta, completing both a 40 hour intensive mediation course and a two day Advanced Mediation course. Nathan has 8 years of experience and has facilitated many successful resolutions. Nathan’s hourly rate for mediation is $375/hr+gst.
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